Wow, I cannot believe it is the end of September already. This month have flown by quick. I hope your September was decent. What I like to do toward the end of the month is a recap. I feel like every month we should look back at all the things that have happened in our lives. Just contemplate on all of the unexpected turns and all the goodness that have entered.

What were some unexpected and inconvenience events that have happened to you? How and why did it occurred? Was it preventable? How did you get yourself out of it? Did it work? What lessons have your learned from these unpleasant events?

I know for me, a close family member is extremely ill. It has been an emotional roller coaster ride. Due to my “interesting” relationship with this person, it has been a tug-of-war of feelings. Especially since recently, things appear very bleak. Besides that, I have been dealing with my internal battle of finding my happiness. I have been going to therapy, taking meds, exercising, eating right, journaling, using a sophisticated planner to keep me organize, and my occasional talks to the supreme being. I strongly believed with doing all this, I would be happier. Unfortunately, not so much. Don’t get me wrong, I have been feeling better and more productive, but there is still this part of me that is not happier. It bothers me a lot. I have been in so much work on myself and I still find myself in this emotional limbo. I have explained this to my therapist, and she stated, I have been doing things for my mental health. But the activities don’t bring me joy. I must find something that brings me joy. She actually made it my homework. Don’t you hate when therapists gives you homework? Lol! Mine is due today and I still don’t have an answer. Maybe she can help me during my session today. Shrug. But those has been my issues for September.

What were the positive experiences that have occurred? How did it make you feel? Would you do it again? What were the small things that brought a smile to your face? Did you try to do that activity everyday or as much as possible? What are you grateful for this month? It doesn’t have to be anything big, it can be a tiny thing.

I know for me, of course celebrating the anniversary with my lover is the biggest positive experience. It was great to be with the person I love and celebrate our time together. It brought me hope about us. I also did a lot of socializing, which is not my thing, but my lover encouraged me to do so. I have gone to a crab crawl hosted by my lover’s parents. Delicious homemade seafood, talking, and laughing. Ended the night making smores over the firepit. I traveled to see a friend I haven’t seen in about a year. I have never been at his house and seen his first born. It was great to catch up and finally meet the baby. Didn’t want to let go of that adorable thing. I also hung out with friends I haven’t seen in over a year. Since I am not use to socializing and being around a lot of people constantly, I will admit it was exhausting. I was not mentally and physically ready for all that, but it was totally worth it. To see people and catch up. Depression tends to lie to you and make you believe you’re alone. But seeing everybody reminded me I am not alone and I should reach out more. I did feel better seeing friends. I want to do that more often, but probably not back to back. I need to regain my energy… lol!

From looking back at all the good and bad occasions in September, what are you going to do differently in October? Are there any lessons from September you will definitely carry with you in October? Are there any positive actions you want to take with you in October? What are the things you are looking forward to in October?

For myself, I want to find my happiness and learn how to maturely to communicate my emotions. I have learned that being around people is not so bad and I need to get out of my comfort zone more often. I know I already have a busy schedule next month for meeting more people. I’m excited and already exhausted, lol! I wish everyone good luck to their next month. Remember, take the lessons you have learned with you and adult one day at a time.

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